Last week, we explored resilience, or the confidence we will get through things, even when they are really hard. On our blog, we offered 10 fill-in-the-blank exercises to explore the strengths you already have.
This week, we look at 5 tools to use for coping with the anxiety and stress that arise when we are faced with difficult times. These exercises are suitable for adults and kids.
1.Practice this simple breathing exercise: Notice where in your body you feel stress or anxiety. Inhale while counting to five. Exhale while counting to five. Do this until you feel calmer.
How it works: Slowing and deepening our breathing calms the autonomic nervous system. More oxygen gets to the brain, allowing for greater clarity of thought. Heartrate and blood pressure lower. Counting helps the brain unloop from intrusive thoughts.
This exercise can be done anywhere, anytime. No one will notice. It’s just breathing (and counting).
2. Progressive muscle relaxation: By tensing and relaxing muscle groups, your body will release tension and stress. Here is a video to guide you through progressive muscle relaxation: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1nZEdqcGVzo
Here is a video you can use as a progressive relaxation guide for children: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cDKyRpW-Yuc
3. Visualization: Have you ever thought, “I’d feel much better if I could just get away?” Even if it’s not feasible to physically escape, we can send our minds on momentary vacations. Here are 8 visualizations you can use to send your brain to a relaxing place: https://www.calm.com/blog/visualization-meditation
4. Identify the things you can’t control: First, write a list of everything you absolutely cannot control in a difficult situation. Once you’ve completed the list, read it once, crumple the list, and throw it away. You have already established there is nothing you can do about these things. Next, write down everything you can actually do something about, even if it seems trivial. As you begin to focus on the things that are within your control, you may be surprised to find that you feel more empowered. If you struggle to identify things within your control, a supportive friend or family member, or a therapist can assist.
5. Don’t forget the basics of self-care: When we are under great stress, the last things we want to do are to eat well, exercise, or socialize. Refrain from making good self-care choices based on feelings in the moment. Remind yourself that you might not want to do it, but you will be glad you did it when you get to the other side. Hint: self-care tools are items you can include in your list of things within your control.
These tools are not intended to solve your problems. You may find, though, that practicing them will bolster your confidence in your resilience to handle what life throws at you.